Train yourself asking Beautiful Questions
What happens when we ask beautiful questions?
Asking beautiful questions brought me to beautiful outcomes in life: at work, home, in my personal growth; spiritually, financially and physically. It would be a shame if I keep what I have learnt from my mentors and my own experiences to myself only. In my first blog I would like to share with you how asking beautiful questions transformed me and my realities to delightful results.
If you are asking ‘what is wrong with me?’ reframe it to ‘what are my potentials?’ or ‘what gifts are awaiting for me?’ instead.
Instead of ‘Why I have to DO it?’ ask ‘Why do people trust me? Or Do I have to DO it? Especially if you identify yourself as a minority in anyways (neurodivergence, gender, ethnicity, oldest in your family, cyclists in North America, environmentalists or an empath)
Instead of ‘How crazy it will get?’ ask ‘What blessings this will bring me and all involved?’
Connect with your breath right Now and join me in a small experiment:
Write down your current problem you have
Read it out loud.
Breath into your belly and slowly breath out.
Can you make your question beautiful? For example: say your original question was ‘why do I get such a crazy/bad/mean/stupid/
neighbours
parents
boss
partner
kids
pet
I would reframe and reword your questions into ‘How can I love/let go/ heal/ enjoy/ change what I have?’ What is in my control?
You answer may be different, mine is attitude is everything as long as we live we have a choice and agency on how we contribute or remove ourselves from relationships we have.
The truth is there are laws that govern universal love beyond the physical. Like law of gravity, law of attraction, law of biology and etc. We attract or attracted to people, events and problems because we carry energies within us that will grow us to our next experiences (positive/negative/neutral)
Bad news: you are carrying energies that you are not aware of. Such as anger, jealousy, guilt, shame, victimhood and leftover energies of traumatic events you have experiences. Due to human experiences and historic events (parental arguments, witnessing divorce, bullying, wars, car crash related injuries, judgements in public, violence of any kind in school, home or via internet)
Good news: you can change yourself to what you want to become. You can work on yourself to the version of your liking and enjoy the process of becoming your best version.
So where do we go from here and what can you do?
Accept you got here as a result of your knowledge and given opportunities and privileges. Write down your perfect version as a parent/employer/partner and etc.,
In my own experience I observe people I admire and try to copy their actions modifying to my own setting as we have to stay grounded in our own realities as each of us UNIQUE.
My perfect version is when no one and nothing can upset me and I can use humor towards my getting too serious and important. I remember to remember my tools and I do not take anyone or anything personally. I am able to de-escalate arguments and disagreement into manageable outcomes with Win Win Win for myself towards my goals and dreams without going against my values and principles.
Let me share my personal story. Just before pandemic I was aware I have to change my job. I was proudly working in a great company, but my direct supervisor was not a great fit for me. I respect him as a human being and my manager however, he was not able to see my potentials. My colleagues called him ‘sexist’. I tolerated him because I loved the mission of the firm. My manager was born into a culture where women were born to serve family/society and role of women were to be mothers and wives. Every single day I would experience some form of dismissal: Instead of assigning me a new task he would send me home saying ‘go to your family’. He would not give me access to data bases my colleagues had access to. I could not use and master my SQL data query skills. With my acceptance and admiration of Canadian culture and beliefs I knew I have to network to change what is under my control – firing my boss.
So I started asking questions ‘how can I enjoy what I have?’ I found tons of inspiration to play around with words when I describe my work situations while looking for a new project assignment . I started saying ‘I am my own boss’. Instead of saying my boss is ‘sexist’ I used to say he is ‘culturally ignorant’ which was more accurate then calling him ‘sexist’. He was a kind man and I had a lot of time to network within the firm. Eventually I secured a role in a strategic project and got myself a beautiful promotion.
What happens when we reframe our questions into an intentionally open and beautiful questions?
- Positive Questions attract positive answers
- Empowering statements about yourself guide and lead you to actions towards becoming 1 step closer to your desired state
- Disciplined actions bring positive outcomes: you learn and win confidence over unknowns
As desire is basis of life expansion you will become more open to new experiences. Next you will start attracting new energy in new people, events, acquire new skills, friends, perspectives, opportunities and new level of effectiveness and increased capacity. Your attitude will start shifting towards being more curious. Curiosity is powerful. Get curious about your own potentials as all answers are within us. Ask a beautiful question ‘What is my highest potential?’ and ‘What gifts are awaiting for me?’
Every morning when you wake up ask beautiful and open questions:
- What is the highest potential of this day?
- What are the beautiful things I will see today?
- How would I love to show up today at this or that meeting/ event?
- How would I prefer (which state of mind) to end the day?
I promise you, YOU will start building muscle in your neuropath towards beautiful realities.
Eventually if you keep the beautiful questioning habits steady and consistent you will start seeing what you used to ignore and took for granted.
Before falling asleep ask beautiful questions too:
- How can I make my sleep most relaxed and rejuvenating?
- What beautiful thoughts would I like to fall asleep with?
- What was great about today?
- What I am truly grateful?
- What I am proud of today?
- How can I love myself (my partner, kids, roommate) more?
You need to put some healthy boundaries about what information you put into your mind before going to bed. Avoid reading news and watching TV for latest global events as main stream media has no interest in your well rested sleep. Thus it is your business and responsibility and choice what kind of information you feed your mind with.
Way back in the times I have no clue or boundaries around information for my mind. I would allow myself to wake up to news and then my morning will start from worries about global events I have no control or caused in any ways. I remember watching Breaking Bad and suspecting every teacher of Chemistry of being a drag lord. I did not realize how sensitive I was to information I exposed myself to.
Now I do not watch TV as I let go off it completely. I am learning myself and it is fascinating to be curious about my ability and capacity to improve my environments.